My Winter’s Nightmare

Walking by your house on these lonely nights
I watch the pavement chase me
While I notice the empty bleeding from my heart
Drip by drip it follows me as I run from the truth
Avoiding the responsibility of you needing me

My feet planted as I make this bench my new home
I can see you through your window clearly
And its clear to me that this has become my destiny
Blowing out this cold air slowly
Watching your heartache turn into cloudless worries

This worries me that I can no longer see you
Moving from bedroom to bedroom
As if you have truly moved on
Truly moved along realizing that you no longer need me
This weather change has made my knees weak
This week has become unbearable
And you’ve become immune to my deception

Praising my secrets
I admit that it was my selfishness that left me out in the cold
Stolen memories from the good days we’ve had
The recollections that always make me so sad
Because this dream has become a nightmare
So hard to escape

You open the door
I transform to a deer in the headlights
Looking up at the darkness from the broken streetlights
You approach me
And for one second I’m hoping that you can actually forgive me
My tears have completely frozen on my left cheek
You grab my hands and kiss me slowly

But as I open my eyes
I realize that I am no longer dreaming
I sit there
Watching you continue from bedroom to bedroom
Realizing this is my nightmare

Copyright 2012 Ta’Mesha Smith

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