Mistrials with Love

What does it mean to be lonely with my feet planted hopelessly on the ground? Forcing myself to not make a sound, not the slightest little peep. The calmness of my body begins to frighten me and I become speechless. What ever happen to protection? A sense of holy disturbance so my soul can awaken. To be so heartbroken with tunnel vision not realizing what’s really happening to me.

Providing him with too much of my energy that I could be putting towards somewhere else. I vowed to never neglect my true love of compassion, love, acceptance, and honesty. The truth is, I’m losing my integrity. Ignoring my intuition and depriving myself of what I truly deserve. I no longer have the energy to stick around for him to grasp my understanding. Simply turned careless because I must ask myself how much can I take? I try my best to be nice and listen without any appreciation in return but the familiarity is growing elderly. Nevermind the fact that I’m too considerate, always wearing my heart on my sleeve so he can be comfortable. Well, now has come the time for me to cover up my abnormal beating heart. As i look down i still see the pulsating with blood gushing, dripping down my arm. It only makes sense to reverse the death of my dignity, disabling my emotions for a while. Being vulnerable towards another is long gone, buried deep in my history.

Copyright 2012 Ta’Mesha Smith


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